Braden Rowan ( Brady) Born 09/28/08

He is finally Here.

Braden Rowan ( Brady) was born at home Sunday 9/28/08 at 3:15pm Weighing 9 lbs and 8 ounces 21 inches long.

Labor began Saturday evening and I called for the Midwives at about 11:00 am Sunday Morning. It was very calm and relaxing. I chose not to have my water broken but to wait and Labor slowly on my own.

Around 2:15 I got into the pool. That relaxed me enough to progress things along pretty quickly. I then started getting Back Labor so David was great and pushed really hard on my back during the whole process

( which now is very sore but was heaven during delivery).

About an hour later I was ready to push and when the water broke he was born within 2min. Avery was the first to see his face in the water. (He also was the one to cut the cord).

The kids were amazing, As I knew they would be. It was the most challenging thing I have ever and probably will ever do in my life but as tough as it was, I felt so empowered and just almost euphoric after he came out. I have said that when he was placed into my arms that I heard harps in my head (LOL) I have never felt so good as I did at that moment.

David and I were so pleased with how it all happened. It was perfect and was more fulfilling then even we thought it would be.

Thank God for my incredible Husband for knowing exactly what I needed at the very moment I needed it the most. my kids that were just as in amazement as we were of the whole miracle of life. To my wonderful Midwives that did everything the way we wanted it. To Brady for coming out as quickly as possible and coming on the most perfect day ever.

and To God for seeing me worthy enough to have given me everything I could ever dream of.

I have an overwhelming feeling of missing my grandmother. I think because something amazing is happening and I want to share it with her.
she was always happy for me when good things happen. There for me when I needed her the most. As a child she was the only Adult person ( that lived close to us ) that showed me Love and would tell me I was worthy of it.

When she was dying, as I was there for her, She was still comforting me. she was not perfect but she was good to me and my kids and really that's all that is important.

She taught me something really valuable about people, What you say means nothing but when something happens and you need help. Who was there and who wasn't! People will show you who they are so pay attention because those are the moments that really count.

I wish I could have her here, I feel like I need her. But I know that she is with me, I feel her. When I am holding my new baby boy in my arms, I will feel her watching and Loving me.

New Life is coming, yet reality is the same.

Hormonal feelings lead to questions
I already know the answser to.

Makes you want to open your heart
to undeserving.

Seeing things that are not there.
only cure is our new life that
lives in me.

I ask why to things that I don't understand.
but I do know why, makes it worse somehow.

Blood is not thicker, only True Love can servive, when it is worthy.

I have Love, Not the Love God
intended at birth but unconditional Love that grows still.

Never put your faith in others, Sad but they will always fail you. I promise to stop asking why they don't have Love and be sad for them because they can't.

New Life is coming and only true Love will bare witness. We will not share this blessed time with you. That is my gift to him. only Love will surround him.

the thoughts of sorrow and Loss and what never will be.
will be replaced with fellings of Love and Thanks for our blessings and good fortune.

WE HAVE POWER! 9/20/08

Yippee! We finally have power. Sunday was a little scary, we (David and I ) had to go out back and try to unmangle our gazebo from the fence before it took off and hurt someone or flew into their house. we were thrown into the fence and have some cuts and bruises and damage to the house and fence but we are ok for the most part and thankful for that.

The first night was ok, the kids thought it was great. they camped out downstairs and did not have school the next day. as the days progressed they were really bored and the library was also closed so that would have been our pass time of choice. Thank goodness we had a generator for most of the week. we celebrated my 33rd Birthday in the dark but I have not enjoyed them much since turning 30 so this just added to the dislike.

To add another Stress to all of this was that we were afraid the baby would decide to come early and no power! but it is now Saturday and our power is on and we are ready now Baby, when ever you are!!!

Home Visit 9/09/08

The Midwives came for their Home visit On Monday to check out the Birth pool and Kit. We wanted to make sure that everything was put up properly and that we were not missing anything.

We got the green light and are ready to go, whenever this little one wants to make his appearance.

The kids are so excited and just are really anxious for him to come. Avery asks me everyday if I feel OK or if I feel any different today!
Grace and Abby kiss my belly and tell him to come out and play. I tell the kids that he will come on the best day possible, The day of his Birthday and only him and God know when that is. ( but I am really anxious too ).

I want everything to be perfect but I really don't know how many more times I can mop my floor or scrub my toilet. I know that this is my 4Th baby and not my 1st but I think I am more excited this time then ever, the first time, you have the added stress of not knowing what to expect and you second guess everything. This time not only do I get to feel my own joy but that of my husband and the kids as well and anyone who truly enjoy their children know what I mean when I say, your kids excitement truly makes everything more enjoyable .

We do know what this little Angel will be called and Have told a select few but I will save it from the Blog until after his Birth.

Who knows maybe my next entry will be to announce his Birth.

Peanut's First Day.

My Nephew Anthony ( AKA Peanut ) Started his first day at the new school and I'm very excited for him.

It is so hard to believe he is almost 17 years old, I look at him and I know he is all grown up but when I think of Peanut I still see him as this little boy with curls in the back of his head.

He will most likely want to kill me when he See's this but I am so happy for him and I know he will do so well at the school and we are all proud of you Peanut!

Asking for Prayers

I am asking for prayers for my cousin and her family. She spent last year and part of this year fighting melanoma. She had surgery to remove a mole, surrounding tissue, and some lymph nodes that were affected. Then she went through 11 months of drug therapy that left her 30 pounds lighter, extremely low on energy and thinned her hair.

She had a full body scan in April which showed a spot on her lung. Since that time she has had a few more tests. The results of her most recent lung scan were not good. The spot on her lung has enlarged. She went for a needle biopsy of the spot on Tuesday and the results were positive.
The melanoma has spread to her lungs. Melanoma is a very aggressive form of cancer. In just 18 weeks the spot on her lungs grew from the size of a pencil point to the size of a dime. Surgery, chemo and radiation will not help. There is an experimental drug study which may open up in the next few weeks and they are going to apply for it. It could be weeks or it could be years. It really just depends on the individual.

She is 47 and by far is one of the sweetest people I know.


Please keep her and her family in your thoughts and prayers.