WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... something perfect to wear
if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE . a youth she's content to leave behind....
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE . a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age....
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and... a black lace bra...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .. one friend who always makes her laugh..
and one who lets her cry...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... a good piece of furniture
not previously owned by anyone else in her family...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .. eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE a feeling of control over her destiny..
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to fall in love without losing herself..
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend, without ruining the friendship...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... when to try harder...
and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that her childhood may not have been perfect... but it's over...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... what she would and wouldn't do...
for love or more...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.... how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. . whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen table... or a charming Inn in the woods.... when her soul needs soothing....
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. What she can and can't accomplish in a day... a month... and a year...

Be yourself...everyone else is already taken.

MAYA ANGELOU

Isn't She an Angel? LOL

THEIR WATCHING YOU!!!! We don't even remember that being said but it's a reminder that they are always paying attention even when your not!

Halloween 2008

Brady spent the whole Trick or Treat in the sling, He fell asleep almost immediately).

Grace is a witch ( she said a good and Pretty witch ) Avery and Brady are skeletons and Abby of course is Hannah Montana.

Cayden with Pumpkin on his head.

Brady's Picture on the Midwives website

http://www.choicemidwives.org/?page_id=102

Brady already Adapting to Daddy's Nap Schedule.

Don't you just want to eat um up?

Uncle Bill and Brady

Here are some new pictures of our little man.

Yesterday the Mohel came to the house for the dreaded circumcision! As horrible as that is, trust me it is much more humane here at home then in the hospital. The Mohel was wonderful and Loving with Brady. Most important the whole thing took 45 seconds then I nursed him immediately after.

I have had some mild discomfort being that I had 1st and second degree tears and have decided not to stitch. It will be a longer recovery but smarter in the end.

The kids are madly in Love with their little brother. So many hands to hold him and not enough time in the day. ( exspecially when I want to hog him to myself ) the midwives say that water babies are calmer and he is certainly a calm baby. he is just perfect. It's funny how Avery and Grace look alike and Abby and Brady look alike, Amazing how that happens.

Family Pictures

Cayden (Cool Dude )

Peanut and Cayden

Brady and Grandpa

Brady and Grandma

Daddy, Avery, Grace and Brady

Brady with Cousin D.J

Brady's Birthday cake we shared with Aunt Susi,

Uncle Billy, Peanut, Bailey, D.J and Cayden.

Video of Brady

Call from Grandparents.

Yesterday I received a very nice phone call from my grandparents. My grandma has had some medical problems this last year and It was such a relief to hear her voice and to know she is doing better.

They called to congratulate us on Brady's birth, It was a nice surprise and very much appreciated by David and myself. Everything that she is going through it would be understandable to not get a call but for them to set that aside and take the time to acknowledge my children just proves to me what I already know that there love for me and my kids are genuine and I Love and respect them for that. My kids will always know how good they have been to us.

Braden Rowan ( Brady) Born 09/28/08

He is finally Here.

Braden Rowan ( Brady) was born at home Sunday 9/28/08 at 3:15pm Weighing 9 lbs and 8 ounces 21 inches long.

Labor began Saturday evening and I called for the Midwives at about 11:00 am Sunday Morning. It was very calm and relaxing. I chose not to have my water broken but to wait and Labor slowly on my own.

Around 2:15 I got into the pool. That relaxed me enough to progress things along pretty quickly. I then started getting Back Labor so David was great and pushed really hard on my back during the whole process

( which now is very sore but was heaven during delivery).

About an hour later I was ready to push and when the water broke he was born within 2min. Avery was the first to see his face in the water. (He also was the one to cut the cord).

The kids were amazing, As I knew they would be. It was the most challenging thing I have ever and probably will ever do in my life but as tough as it was, I felt so empowered and just almost euphoric after he came out. I have said that when he was placed into my arms that I heard harps in my head (LOL) I have never felt so good as I did at that moment.

David and I were so pleased with how it all happened. It was perfect and was more fulfilling then even we thought it would be.

Thank God for my incredible Husband for knowing exactly what I needed at the very moment I needed it the most. my kids that were just as in amazement as we were of the whole miracle of life. To my wonderful Midwives that did everything the way we wanted it. To Brady for coming out as quickly as possible and coming on the most perfect day ever.

and To God for seeing me worthy enough to have given me everything I could ever dream of.

I have an overwhelming feeling of missing my grandmother. I think because something amazing is happening and I want to share it with her.
she was always happy for me when good things happen. There for me when I needed her the most. As a child she was the only Adult person ( that lived close to us ) that showed me Love and would tell me I was worthy of it.

When she was dying, as I was there for her, She was still comforting me. she was not perfect but she was good to me and my kids and really that's all that is important.

She taught me something really valuable about people, What you say means nothing but when something happens and you need help. Who was there and who wasn't! People will show you who they are so pay attention because those are the moments that really count.

I wish I could have her here, I feel like I need her. But I know that she is with me, I feel her. When I am holding my new baby boy in my arms, I will feel her watching and Loving me.

New Life is coming, yet reality is the same.

Hormonal feelings lead to questions
I already know the answser to.

Makes you want to open your heart
to undeserving.

Seeing things that are not there.
only cure is our new life that
lives in me.

I ask why to things that I don't understand.
but I do know why, makes it worse somehow.

Blood is not thicker, only True Love can servive, when it is worthy.

I have Love, Not the Love God
intended at birth but unconditional Love that grows still.

Never put your faith in others, Sad but they will always fail you. I promise to stop asking why they don't have Love and be sad for them because they can't.

New Life is coming and only true Love will bare witness. We will not share this blessed time with you. That is my gift to him. only Love will surround him.

the thoughts of sorrow and Loss and what never will be.
will be replaced with fellings of Love and Thanks for our blessings and good fortune.

WE HAVE POWER! 9/20/08

Yippee! We finally have power. Sunday was a little scary, we (David and I ) had to go out back and try to unmangle our gazebo from the fence before it took off and hurt someone or flew into their house. we were thrown into the fence and have some cuts and bruises and damage to the house and fence but we are ok for the most part and thankful for that.

The first night was ok, the kids thought it was great. they camped out downstairs and did not have school the next day. as the days progressed they were really bored and the library was also closed so that would have been our pass time of choice. Thank goodness we had a generator for most of the week. we celebrated my 33rd Birthday in the dark but I have not enjoyed them much since turning 30 so this just added to the dislike.

To add another Stress to all of this was that we were afraid the baby would decide to come early and no power! but it is now Saturday and our power is on and we are ready now Baby, when ever you are!!!

Home Visit 9/09/08

The Midwives came for their Home visit On Monday to check out the Birth pool and Kit. We wanted to make sure that everything was put up properly and that we were not missing anything.

We got the green light and are ready to go, whenever this little one wants to make his appearance.

The kids are so excited and just are really anxious for him to come. Avery asks me everyday if I feel OK or if I feel any different today!
Grace and Abby kiss my belly and tell him to come out and play. I tell the kids that he will come on the best day possible, The day of his Birthday and only him and God know when that is. ( but I am really anxious too ).

I want everything to be perfect but I really don't know how many more times I can mop my floor or scrub my toilet. I know that this is my 4Th baby and not my 1st but I think I am more excited this time then ever, the first time, you have the added stress of not knowing what to expect and you second guess everything. This time not only do I get to feel my own joy but that of my husband and the kids as well and anyone who truly enjoy their children know what I mean when I say, your kids excitement truly makes everything more enjoyable .

We do know what this little Angel will be called and Have told a select few but I will save it from the Blog until after his Birth.

Who knows maybe my next entry will be to announce his Birth.

Peanut's First Day.

My Nephew Anthony ( AKA Peanut ) Started his first day at the new school and I'm very excited for him.

It is so hard to believe he is almost 17 years old, I look at him and I know he is all grown up but when I think of Peanut I still see him as this little boy with curls in the back of his head.

He will most likely want to kill me when he See's this but I am so happy for him and I know he will do so well at the school and we are all proud of you Peanut!

Asking for Prayers

I am asking for prayers for my cousin and her family. She spent last year and part of this year fighting melanoma. She had surgery to remove a mole, surrounding tissue, and some lymph nodes that were affected. Then she went through 11 months of drug therapy that left her 30 pounds lighter, extremely low on energy and thinned her hair.

She had a full body scan in April which showed a spot on her lung. Since that time she has had a few more tests. The results of her most recent lung scan were not good. The spot on her lung has enlarged. She went for a needle biopsy of the spot on Tuesday and the results were positive.
The melanoma has spread to her lungs. Melanoma is a very aggressive form of cancer. In just 18 weeks the spot on her lungs grew from the size of a pencil point to the size of a dime. Surgery, chemo and radiation will not help. There is an experimental drug study which may open up in the next few weeks and they are going to apply for it. It could be weeks or it could be years. It really just depends on the individual.

She is 47 and by far is one of the sweetest people I know.


Please keep her and her family in your thoughts and prayers.

35 Weeks

I can't Believe how fast it has gone this time. We picked up the Birthing pool today and I have the birth kit together so I guess were just waiting for him to make his appearance.

The kids are so excited and are really anxious for him to come. Grace thinks we can talk to him and convince him that it is time. She is so cute, she just wants to hold him and rock him to sleep.

I of course just hope it happens with the kids already home ( weekend would be great ) So we don't have to rush to pick them up from school.

All of the kids have important jobs to do at the birth so there is no way their missing it. ( they would be devastated ) Avery is really excited, he has the very important job of cutting the cord after he knows all of the blood gets to the baby. ( he is very series about this to and has asked all of the necessary questions.) I am so lucky to have really great kids that are just so into this and not concerned or nervous at all and I know we will all be so happy we did this and it will bring the kids even closer to each other and will give them a special bond with their new baby brother.

First Day of School 8/19/08

Today could have been really sad and lonely with the kids back at school. Avery started 3rd grade, Abby 1st ( full day ) It's just Grace and I till the baby comes. Grandma and Grandpa asked to take Grace today since the big kids would be gone and Gracie I know will miss them like crazy. David took the day off so that he could be with me and maybe I wouldn't be so sad with all of the kids gone today.

David and I went to lunch and did some shopping, It really did help because by time I picked up Grace and got home it was time to get the kids.

Avery and Abby said they Loved school and have made many new friends along with the old friends from last year, It is always a relief when they come home from school happy. All of our children are very social and not afraid to speak there mind. ( Not that they had a chance since David and I are both very verbal and opinionated ) I think it is crucial today for our children to be not only kind and compassionate but to also believe in themselves and fight for what is right. As long as they do that, they will do well in their life and I will always be here to cheer them on and Of course count the minutes till they come home. LOL

Visit at our house with Bobby,Hailey,Bailey,D.J, Peanut,Cayden, Susi and Bill.

Cayden Loved Piglet so he took it home.

After several hours of play they Passed out.

Bill and Cayden

You think he gets his picture taken much?

I'm going to suck your blood!

Hailey and Cayden

The Girls fell in Love with Hailey.

Avery teaching Cousin Hailey how to play the guitar, It really looked like she was paying attention!

Bunny Park

Bailey and Cayden

My friend Angelita's little girl Lily

Avery and D.J

Bailey,Grace,Abby,Avery And D.J

Bailey,Grace, Avery,Rusty,Abby and D.J

Things I have learned.

I've Learned That:
* Somethings you do in an instant, Can give you heartache for
Lifetime.
* It's taken me a long time to become the person I want to be.
* You can keep going even after you can't.
* The good you do will be forgotten tomorrow.
* We are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
* Regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first,
When the lust fades there had better be something else in it's place.
* Hero's are people who do what needs to be done, regardless of the
consequences.
* Money is a lousy way of keeping score.
* My husband and I can do anything or nothing and still have the
best time.
* Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to,
doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
* Maturity has more to do with what you've learned from life
experiences and less to do with how many Birthday's you've
celebrated.
* You're family wont always be there for you,Sometimes it takes a
complete stranger to show you compassion.
* Our past and life circumstances may influence who we are but only
we are responsible for who we become.
* You shouldn't be so eager to know everything, What you find out
could change your life forever.
* just because 2 people argue, doesn't mean they don't love each
other. Just because they don't argue doesn't mean they do.
* Your life can change in a moment by someone you've never even
met.